Awards acceptance speech

[Mike check 1…2…3]

[Clears throat…]


Thank you, dear bloggers. Thank you for showing faith in my dementia to consider me intellectual and lovely enough to be rewarded. I humbly accept whatever has been conferred upon me, with the deepest gratitude for one and all.

First of all, I’d like to thank for hosting me.

Secondly, I’d like to thank my clothes for bearing the real me, my shoes for walking me and food for feeding me.

Thirdly, I’d like to thank my family, friends, hot female admirers, Trailblazer-tattooed-on-their-back models, cool kids shouting their throats out over TCGH and me, exhaustive shoppers for official Trailblazer merchandise(including Trailblazer lipstick in 47 flavours honourably selected by BJP vice-president Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi and Trailblazer condoms in…err…a few flavours selected specifically by Mallika Sherawat and Rakhi Sawant).

Fourthly, I’d like to thank my well-wishers, deep well-wishers, well-wishers trying to force me into a deep well and other well-wishers from across the border.

Fifth, I’d like to thank ex-President George Bush, Lalu Yadav, Mayawatiji/Behenji, Arundhati Roy, General Kayani, related state/non-state organizations and the gun-trotting folks from Muridke.

And finally I thank all those working effortlessly to convert India into a Hindu Rashtra or an Islamic Mulak. I hope your labour meets its right ends.

Thank you for your love.

(In response to Catwampusme, Smitha, Kiran and AmreekanDesi’s felicitations.)

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17 thoughts on “Awards acceptance speech

  1. Best acceptance speech i have heard in a while!

    Your awards are well deserved. Keep up the good work!

  2. With such a great speech, you will never know who came with the flowers and who with the bullets!

  3. Lolzz! This is known as true trailblazer ishtyle! I must say, I like it….hehehe
    Jokes apart, you deserve many more awards for-
    whatever you write, you write it the best!
    Friends forever…:)

  4. This is awesome. But you left out Sanjay Dutt and the Sadhvi. I am sure they’re feeling neglected

  5. Oh you have hurt feelings of obama! and clinton.. how can you not thank them ?

    While you are at it.. musharaff would also love being thanked.. even mandela would 🙂

  6. You mocked Rakhi Sawant :-O She will come for you trust me 😛

    Congrats for all the awards and that was a wonderful speech 😀

  7. Dude, Congrats, obviously you deserve it. I Echo with Smitha, you deserve an award for this acceptance speech 😀

  8. Are you sure you were felicitated and not anything else? You seem quite ‘happy’… 😀

  9. @Smitha
    Thank you.

    Thank you.

    @Vinod Sharma
    Thank you. Yes, I’m as much an assasination target as is the craving for taking me to the bedroom :-).

    Thank you.

    @Phoenix Ritu
    Yes. Mr. Dutt called me up and told me that I should make up for it by adopting my wife’s surname. He says this is the punishment I deserve.

    Sadhviji called me up and condemned me to hell. She also said that I will find a mysterious object attached to a cycle next to my house.


    Thank you. I trust you.

    Aww…Runnnnn!! 😉

    Thank you.

    @Hitch Writer
    I’m on the run. Somebody stop her for me pleeejjj!

    How did you know?

    Oh yes, I’ve found him now. The horny stalker from the woods, who sneeks into my bedroom in search for raw flesh and catches up on some LIVE action without paying up. It’s you. The evil blogger from MirrorCracked who has made it a habit of pissing people off.


  10. Kick ass speech man . Hindu-Rashtra and Islamic mulak was the best . 😀 I actually laughed out loud .

  11. YOU are amazing,,, I have missed so many of your posts. I am going to each and every post of yours and trying to leave a comment on each one, but i think i will go on repeating that you are improving with every post.
    This one was hilarious.
    My next destination-MURIDKE

  12. @Amit
    Thank you.

    Thank you.

    Strong words indeed. Muridke tickets available at Trailblazer Travels on a 75% discount. Simply because we are running empty flights. 🙂

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